Dear K,
I thought I’d sit down and write this because after I had my baby I kept thinking “why does no-one tell you about this?!” So I thought I would, tell you, and also I hope it will be helpful to know that whatever it is you experience you’re in good company.
1. Life as you know it is thrown upside down. Day is night and night is day (literally). Don’t worry it’s the same for everyone, like being dropped off the edge of a cliff! All you can do is try not to lose yourself. You will need a break not to mention a shower and some sleep. Take help when its offered, ask when it isn’t, and DON’T feel guilty for looking after yourself.
2. No matter what you feel you won’t be the first or the last, you are not a bad mother, and you are not weird! I truly hope you have a magical experience but if that isn’t the case (even some of the time) its OK too. Don’t resist the shit days, its all part of the journey and you’re not doing anything wrong by having them. When the baby is crying for the zillionth time, you smell of old milk, all but forgotten what the inside of a pub looks like, and you want to punch Gina Ford square in the face that just means you’re doing it right!
3. You can’t get it right every day (or even ever!). What works one day won’t be the same another so don’t beat yourself up about the routine. You and your baby are figuring it out together, and what’s important is what YOU think not some twat you met at NCT class.
4. In case I haven’t mentioned, you’re NOT ALONE! It can feel a bit isolating being home with a baby, your other half will have gone back to work and its just you and your little one chugging along in the new world. Life on the outside can feel like it doesn’t include you but it does and you aren’t missing anything.
5. Take time to enjoy the moment. Whilst it may feel like time is passing very slowly and all you want is sleep it actually goes by in a heart beat. Its easier said than done but stop when you can and just look at your baby in wonder. You have done the most amazing thing, your tiny creation is perfect and amazing in equal measure, and you are bloody wonderful!
Love from your mummy friend x

 

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